i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
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