I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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