my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
