its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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