My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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