You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I supernannyed him into submission
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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