If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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