I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
