I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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