Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
we made out on top of his cat.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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