so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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