no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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