Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Still dying that you shit outside
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
