he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Randomize
