The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
