I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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