She is in my trunk
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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