using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Randomize