guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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