laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
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