I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
