Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
nutella sex= disaster
two words: eviction party
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
