Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
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