your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Randomize