Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
