i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
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