I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
operation have a gay friend backfired
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
