tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Only a mothe r could love this liver
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Randomize
