You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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