Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Randomize
