OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
