I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
