i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Randomize
