Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
