Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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