Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
