My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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