found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I met the friendliest cop last night
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
