Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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