we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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