you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
My vagina is officially offended.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Randomize
