While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
