i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Randomize
