I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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