he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
