How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
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