Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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