is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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