I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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