my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize